Tuesday, July 7, 2009

A STEP GONE WRONG WITH…….. THE STRANGER



Dude I am feeling bored, spiritless…. Have nothing much to do…. My college takes my time and when I am free, I am idle…. Well u must be thing that why don’t I study??? But studies are something to be done only when exams come, and I am anyways good at them…….. J What should I do, what should I do??? Have not been into a chatting room from some while now. What’s harm in passing time that ways????
UUmmm….. The rooms are interesting…. 40’s room can be interesting….. Click and I log on…….. Damm these buzzers again…. Fake people, fake profiles, webcams, pictures, what not shit…. That’s why I don’t prefer to be here…. But I am all vella for now…. So you see….. Random Random people…. No one interests me………. Oh some ‘ak’ buzzed me…..
Me: Ur asl???
AK: Alex/24/m……. U?
Well I wrote my age, my location…… You would feel ‘what an idiot?’ But I am clever I know. People cannot be trusted on net and I very very well know it. Lets see how this goes on anyways. What harm would he do if in anycase I tell my real age n name(Only 1st name, not Sirname, I told you I am clever)…………..
He seems interesting to me…. Its been 2 days…….. He flirts well, and boasts about him quite a while. He is half Indian, half American… Would be coming to India for business in few days…… What more should I say??? The equation is quite comfortable between us, I like talking to him, he likes it too…. We talk more as friends. But yeah, a major problem is there, he wants to see my pic or want my number now……. Bloody hell, I am not gonna do anything like that…. I am not stupid….. I know its risky….. And I am a girl afterall. He knows it, he understands it, but still……. Anyways I like talking to him, that’s the only thing that matters for now……
After a week
Well I am still chatting with Alex. Its getting dangerous a bit… I have shown him how I look. I can’t believe it myself though, but I did that. He fails to identify me in my pics…. And says I look totally different in different pics of mine…… Funny but clever he is…… He has shown me his pic too, just 1 of it. Quite handsome he is IF THAT’S HIS PIC. I know people fool around a lot here, so I am taking all the probabilities…… But Alex understands me, he knows how a girl is, he knows the values that she carries…….. Oops, I forgot to tell you his family background. He is half Indian, half American, Father is from Goa, and Mom from USA. So that’s the reason is can understand a girl’s psychology well……… Anyways, its all cool and fine for now………. Hopefully it remains so……
After 10 days
You won’t believe I have given Alex my number. He came to India and we chatted normally on chat. Was telling me about his cruises and all. But then suddenly said that there is no point talking if we can’t be in touch regularly. Online its tough as our timings don’t match….. He is very convincing as I said before and I really have started trusting him a lot…. I know I know I should be cautious, I took all that in view, and then gave it…. He called me…… He has a sweet voice, he talks intelligent, has that American accent but blended with Indian too….. His hindi is supercute…… We tease each other a lot, play pranks, listen to what opinions we both hold from inside, I told him about my family, my boy friend. I love talking to him and being with him when he is low…. I can say I found a true friend on net J But we argue too, we both love doing that…
After 15 days
Alex and me share something more than friendship I guess. I like him. Is that wrong? It is I know, how much do I know him only? You can’t fall in love with a guy whom you met on net, and then now we just talk on phone…. The situations are very complicated though. I have a boy friend in London, whom I can’t confess all this too, how should I? And its too early for that anyways… I don’t know if what ever he says can be trusted or not? He sent me a mail the other day with the name of some’ Abhishek Kuru….’ What ever……. I countered him on the same that how come A does not stand for Alex but Abhishek??? He has his own reasons to give that it got hacked and everything and all…. Something is fishy out there I know… But I like him, I can’t help it. He says the same too and I can feel that in him. But I have to b cautious.
After 5 days
Its been 2 months I have been talking to Alex now. Yesterday he called. As usual e were having fun teasing and pulling each other’s leg. Damm I like him… We both understand our limitations but have left it on time. Lets see what is in store for us… He was generally teasing me, kind off went over board this time…. How could I take something against a girl…. While smiling and laughing, even I said a lot of stuff to him….. Probably said a lot…… He got hurt….. But as a nice gentleman, wished me n slept…….. 5 minutes passes, he did not call…… I thought to call instead…. He was feeling low, I was rude….. But then he tells me that I don’t have to take him seriously, afterall how much do I know him only??? I asked, how much do I know you??? He said ‘ You know I am married since 6 years, I have a kid’. He must have been joking, I said the same, but his seriousness astonished me completely…. He was dead serious about it…. He confessed he was not 24 but 30 and he liked talking to me, never wanted to spoil it, that’s why never told me……. But how could he???? I trusted him blindly……. We shared so much……. He knows we did…. He still likes me, he still loves me, but yeah, not so seriously as I do….. He has been thinking that I am a clever girl, how could I give into my feelings for a stranger??? But I did, I was cautious all this while but this…..??????? I don’t know what to do, whom to blame??? I am hurt….. He says nothing has changed for him, but for me…. EVERYTHING DID…….. I am very very angry with myself, disappointed that how could I let him in so easily?? I was careful all this while…. But feelings did get hurt, they do eventually…….. I am out of his life now, have deleted his no. Don’t know what should I think about him. He might have misused my number, but didn’t do that though, but still I feel cheated……. I still don’t know who he was…. The Alex whom I knew or what this guy is now???
HE JUST TOOK A PART OF ME AWAY FROM ME………
Moral : Feelings can’t be controlled, they know no limitations and no barriers……. The mind tries to stop you. Stop at the right time. People don’t end up hurting anyone is such cases but themselves………
PS: This was a real life incident. Hope my readers learn something out of it. J