IN THE TWILIGHT ZONE

So I am back finally!!!!!!!!! Have been so busy off lately, so many things happening in life & so random at the same time…. So this blog is gonna be totally vague with so many thoughts being poured at the same time. I love expressing myself here coz I guess this is the only place in the World where I can just put my thoughts without any interruption….. And so the right time comes……………..

EXPECTATIONS HURT BIG TYM

This is something my friends have been trying to explain me from the very beginning of my college life…. But I never believed in the above thought. If you don’t hold any expectations from your close ones only, whom will u rely on in life???? But phew….. Guess its time to change this thinking of mine……..

Have not been expecting A LOT I would say but yea, d minimum…… N even that’s not fulfilling now…. I keep on thinking, keep on getting hurt, keep on waiting, but who cares……. So finally I have taken this stand up to COMPLETELY stop expecting from people…. And surprisingly, now when I have implemented it, I realize it was’nt tough at all……. Maybe my feelings are so dead from inside that now I don’t care anymore…. As always, I miss being myself L But can’t help it, the World around you changes you……….. L

MY 2 ANGELS

I was coming home distraught, the same expectations problem in my mind, so many questions, mental exertion and what not…. Plus I had this stupid early extra class on Sunday and the professor did’nt turn up……. Can u believe my luck??????? Anyways I Was dragging myself up the stairs of my home when I finally heard some noises coming from my living room…….. TRING TRING…… Mom opens up with a smile….. ‘Your friends came up to meet you sweetie’……. I see 2 kids sitting in the dining room…… I know this gal, bit from where??? I step in the living room and what I see………… My Joseph Uncle & Flory Aunty (Lets go back to history….. Joseph Uncle & Flory Aunty, as the name portrays are a Christian couple from Kerala. They used to live with us, on the floor my parents decided to rent…. They have been with me since I was an year old…. I have spent my childhood with them…… Going upstairs, coming down, Flory aunty taking me away to play with her, Uncle getting me gifts occasionally……And as I grew up, i got used to them…… Probably I was 10 year old when they decided to shift from our house….. I was obviously upset but soon grew over it….. I used to talk to them always on phone, but gradually I lost the touch with them no matter mumma & papa were in regular contact with them…I have’nt seen them for about 4-5 years now… )

I had just stepped into my living room and seeing them there was …………………. Can’t be put in words……. All I remember was I threw my bag & hugged Joseph Uncle and my aunty……. God………… My happiness knew no bounds……. I was thrilled…….. A moment back I was upset and now I cant stop myself from jumping……. They were overjoyed at their ends…. Especially coming to meet me on Sunday & then realizing that I had my class….. So disappointed they were….. Cursing their luck……. But when they saw me, even they could’nt believe their luck……. I could see tears in my uncle’s eyes……… So strange na, I don’t remember hugging my mom with so much warmth off lately and here I was exultant with both of them around me…… Meeting them after so long…. Still sharing that love, affection & respect……… I can’t remember if I was so happy off lately compared to how I was that time…. I sat with them for an hour, saying was not, telling them all what’s been happening and they just looking at me with so much warmth…… I could see myself blabbering like a 2 year old in front of them and they telling me how I used to be when I was little…… ‘Aunty, is this water from Kerala??? Why don’t you get me the same gift as Nidhi’s? I don’t wanna go downstairs, can I hide here??? Please, mom would make me study, I wanna be here…….’ There was over flow of emotions at that time and so I completely forgot that their kids had accompanied them too…… But mom was taking care of them…… I just wanted to be around my 2 guardian angels…..

God I know you exist. There have been moments when I really need you badly, like that day I needed you soooooo much & you just came in front of me J